I got into conversation with my niece on Facebook as result of a weekly Tweet and Facebook posting that I put out each Sunday:
“What would you like this week?”
It was an excellent opportunity to intervene and cause change, triggered by my friend and allowing me to communicate with her unconscious mind.
Logically, she has been processing something consciously in the same way over and over, whereas the action she needs to take does not require her to think about how she should approach the decision, rather just fulfil her decision to do whatever it is she decided to do.
By using double negatives the brain has to go searching to understand the process as well as the decision and the double negation also ’Reframes*’ the thinking about the event.
* “A frame can refer to a belief, what limits our view of the world. If we let this limiting belief go, new conceptions and interpretation possibilities can develop” ~ Wikipedia
Here’s the conversation
my Niece responded “I would like to stop procrastinating!!!”
my friend responded “What is stopping you from not procrastinating?”
I asked “Do you ever procrastinate at procrastinating?”
the conversation continued:
“Then you do not always procrastinate. So taking my friend’s question: what is stopping you from not procrastinating?”
“Being lazy maybe :(”
“So being lazy is stopping you from procrastinating, which means you work hard at procrastinating.
Isn’t that tiring? I bet you feel tired now”
“My laziness is the cause of my procrastination! Ha ha should I be asleep now :)”
“No, being lazy is not allowing you to procrastinate. Right?”
“I guess procrastinating is pretty lazy, so doesn’t it stem from my laziness??”
“No you are never lazy when you come to procrastinate and you are lazy when you don’t procrastinate – get it?”
“No, all these double negatives are beyond me!! Are you saying that procrastinating isn’t lazy because it means you plan to do something (even if it takes you a while to get round to doing it…)??”
“Yes, it takes lots of effort to procrastinate and a lot less effort NOT to procrastinate
So, actually, while you are procrastinating you are not being lazy, you are just wasting effort. It is just a bum choice.
Just Do It because it takes much less effort than Not doing it”
“Oh, I see you were saying that it takes a lot of effort to procrastinate. Get it now!!! I stopped procrastinating after a few hours, so have done what I need to do now !!:)”
Her mother added “oooohhh my poor head! lol” (- Can you guess what is happening with mother now?)