Here is a guest post I wrote for Richard Lindesay’s blog
TUESDAY, 4 OCTOBER 2011
by Arthur Partridge @AyPee
I have been an NLP Practitioner since 2005 and progressed through the Society of NLP programme to Trainer in 2009 but my curiosity started in 1957.
My next door neighbour used to hold lots of dinner parties and his trick was to hypnotise one of his guests. I was 7 and I have a very vague recollection of seeing a book published by Penguin books on his bookshelf. I was fascinated. He learnt how to hypnotise people from a book?
Time moved on and I became very successful in my life and my passion was Basketball: playing it, refereeing it, managing it, running committees to develop it ….. too much to do … too little time ….. and at some point I set my highest value at ‘Time’ and even, to this day, I run my ‘Time’ value programme when assessing most anything.
How was I going to fit it all in? It will just have to go on a list until the time is right.
I love the feeling as I say “It’s Time” as the feeling rises up through my body and a state of excitement occurs when its time to do x from my list!
In 1998, I attended the Landmark Forum and went on to do their ‘Curriculum for living’. Coming out of that with a real load off! … I offloaded meaning by the ton….
There was all this stuff that meant stuff to me and all it was was stuff!
.. I had stuffed up my life with stuff that meant stuff to me …..
Landmark have this distinction that “Life is empty and meaningless and that doesn’t mean anything” and I Got It! ….. None of it meant anything to anybody other than me. It was my STUFF …. I STUFFED UP!
Suddenly without all that stuff and with a whole raft of distinctions around language and how I could interpret words and actions and so I went onto read (somebody else’s) stuff.
Read?! …… I hadn’t got time for that! Better put that on the list then with the other stuff!
I would read from the top left of a page to the bottom right on the next and think, what did I just read? and have to start again! … But NOW I was reading these great books and the 2, in particular that had me say “Wow!” to myself were: Louise L Hay’s “You can Heal Your Life” and Neale Donald Walsche’s trilogy: “Conversations with God”
There it all was! It was different to The Forum but it was the same. There was the confirmation. They were right!
My new philosophy for living was now set and still runs to this day:
There is only here, there is only now, it doesn’t mean anything, there is nothing in this nanosecond called now, life just occurs to me … and … Its Time … because I say
I describe this as Paradox Management and the Power of Nothing and it sits on a bed of language.
You see, Nothing is important (note the tonal ambiguity you can use pronouncing each of those words ) and in life we constantly have to manage paradoxes – things aren’t what they seem and yet are so obviously what they are.
Life all about balance not happiness!!!!!
I saw John DeMartini talk and there it was again! …and that was his stuff … he gave examples of how life is always in balance and the design of things is to break down
For example: Things are going really well at work and yet life at home is crap … or … have you ever noticed that when that extra little bit of money comes along and you get excited at the thought of what you can do with it, you get a flat tyre …or… when somebody invites to an event that is really exciting, somebody else desperately needs your help at exactly the same time?
Stuff Up break DOWN
It’s the way life works, it tells you when Its Time. It just occurs
The norm is for people and parents , in particular, to say things like “Oh, well, as long as they are happy” and usually as an expectation for someone else, not themselves. I call that a death sentence!!
Someone else’s expectation has been bestowed on you to be happy – life balances out and so the best you can achieve is to be happy 50% of the time BUT the problem now comes that you have to monitor your ‘happiness performance’ to meet the expectation.
“Am I happy about this?” … “Do I have the right to be happy at a time like this” … and whilst all that serious ‘Happy monitoring’ is going on you can’t be happy. So, if , when you are happy, you check to see if you are happy, you have to stop being happy while you check ………. you’re STUFFed!
The 50% each way balance will probably end up ‘40% happy : 60% not’ ratio … and then .. people get unhappy about that! (and pile on more stuff!) At this point the Stuff, being so old by now, begins to rot down, smell and life becomes crap all because someone wanted you to be happy (?!?!?!?!?!?!?!)
Between 1998 and 2000, I doubled my salary and retired, I retired from the Basketball court in 1998 at the age of 48 – It Was Time! and there was Nothing, to stop me. I was in a Stuff free zone and the energy flowed – money is just another form of energy and there wasn’t any Stuff in its way, either.
I don’t do New Year’s resolutions but I do do New Year’s promises. If there is no stuff, then there is no stuff to resolve. There’s nothing so I can do anything.
So in 2001 my promise was to take 1 or 2 things from my list and DO them because It’s Time and there’s nothing to stop me. I’ve always wanted to do this stuff
2001 Golf and Yoga – did yoga for 7 years! Must dust the clubs off!
2002 What was my spirituality? What did I believe about God?
………..2005 “What am I going to do this year?” Hypnosis! Always wanted to do that!It’s TimeI went for Hypnosis and NLP occurred to me and with it the consolidation of language skills
You see, Richard said to me “I find that you are good at getting good people to know you and to talk about you … maybe you have something to share about that?”
I just did.
When you have control of your time with no stuff, energy flows and energy attracts ‘like energy’ and I like energy.
The finest energy in life is people energy.
Offload your crap, help them get rid of their crap, good people appear and life just occurs HAPPILY, all by itself.