I have been saying and hearing “I haven’t got time” a lot recently.
It occurs to me that when people say “I don’t have time’”, that they are are actually telling me that there is something that they are in fear of. They are actually leaving something else outstanding, resulting in a stuck state.
Usually this comes out of some sort of fear and the strange thing is that whatever the fear; it is usually quite insignificant. However, time itself seems to have taken over. Their head is full on conversation about the very thing that they are avoiding. i.e. they are putting in double or treble the effort avoiding something, rather than just doing it.
Here is a link to a conversation about that very point: what-would-you-like-this-to-procrastinate-about-this-week
So the answer in these situations is not a time management system or even priorities.
It is usually to do with some form of prior experience where there may have been a failure, an embarrassment, an upset or something that tends towards the unpleasant. Something not to be repeated.
Breaking this down.
- They are not being honest in the words they are using to converse with themselves.
At worst they have become a victim of their own self talk. It could be that they are not even saying anything at all related to the subject
- Their expectations are not being met or appear to be precarious.
- A past routine has kicked in.
The brain cannot unlearn anything and so if they have taught themselves a routine, the more they practice that routine, the better they get at it. The situation reminds them of a prior occasion when they used this technique.
Like a robot off it fires and takes control.
As you can see all those issues come from past experience but the problem does not exist in the past. It exists now.
Some form of getting present is required, albeit meditation, a short, sharp shock, a crisis. One of those get real moments, some form of upset or simply a change. Anything to break the trance that they are in. A Pattern Interruption, a Hypnotist would say.
A good state changer is Disassociation.
Disassociation from yourself as a captive of time to becoming a Controller Of Time
Imagine floating out of your body and seeing yourself in your stuck position. Float all the way around yourself – a full 360°. Notice what you notice and then, as if you were a puppeteer, move parts of your body:
Maybe add a smile to your face. Changing your body posture and relocate yourself into a different position.
Make fine adjustments and introduce a relaxed posture!
Imagine a time that you were told in really funny joke or imagine a time when something really funny happened to you. You could even imagine that the place that you are in has transported itself to a hot sunny beach or to your favourite holiday destination. Substitute any good feeling here (the naughtier the better, I find! )
Try this one: doreens-story
Imagine floating back in to your body and NOW:
Notice how different you feel.
Notice how different things look.
Notice how different things sound
Notice how much silence there is
Notice the differences and
Notice how your state has changed NOW
Crank up all the good feelings
Get present to what needs to be done next and
JUST DO IT!